“The Q102 Concert was last night. It was ok. I went with (friends) Ok well look what happened before. (My crush) really wanted to go but I didn’t have enough tickets. Well someone backed out and I was all excited cause I was going to tell him he could go for his birthday. Well when I told him he was just like eh I don’t think I want to go. I thought that was kinda weird. Then the next day he told me he wanted the ticket to go himself. I thought that was even weirder. Well the night before the concert he was trying to get me to sell it to him and I wouldn’t. Then I guess he felt too bad cause he told me to give the ticket to someone else cause he said he was going to take my ticket and go with (two other girls). I was so pissed off. Then I asked why he wouldn’t go with me but he’d go with (two other girls) and he said because he was embarrassed of me. I asked him if it was cause I wasn’t pretty enough and he said no then I asked if it was because I wasn’t cool enough and he said well yeah you aren’t as cool as everyone else. I was so hurt. He was being so mean until I started crying. He felt bad after but I still can’t believe that he said that and that he could be that mean. I can’t wait until I don’t like him.”
Reflection
Kids can be mean. Adults can be mean. This is one of those crucial life moments where you take it in, you take a deep breath, and you grow up. He was right. I wasn't one of the cool kids. I didn't wear the coolest clothes or have the coolest friends, and in high school, sometimes that makes all the difference. It hurt... a lot. To know someone is embarrassed of you, especially the boy you have a crush on, is a tough pill to swallow. I will never forget that feeling. The one positive that I walked away with was that I would never in my life make someone else feel how I felt in that moment.
If I knew then what I know now...
I'd tell myself that this wouldn't be the last time someone would be mean to me or make me feel this way. I'd give myself the biggest hug and remind me that it's moments like these that define us. If you never know what it feels like to be on the down side of things, you never learn how to be soft and empathetic with other people's feelings. I'd wipe the tears off my face and instead embrace the moment and appreciate that it made me a better person.
